
At times I felt completely broken
Nothing that was “our fault” but that didn’t stop me beating myself up.
So, a little bit about me for those of you reading this but aren’t sure of my background.
My name is Alice Oppenheimer and I am a International Grand Prix rider, List 2 judge and BDCC Level 3 coach, based in Hampshire at my family’s Headmore Stud. We breed and produce horses to International GP, alongside running a livery yard with a great group of clients and where we aspire to help them to enjoy their horses and fulfil their dreams.
I have been very lucky to have considerable success over the years, I say with gratitude. I’ve amassed 22 national titles and over 50 regional wins, as well as winning internationally at small tour and Grand Prix as well as competing on GB Nations Cup teams.
For a long time we had a lot of success and not too many lows. As you will know, working with horses is not for the faint hearted, it’s long hours and, generally (thanks to the Great British weather) not the easiest of conditions. It is easier to cope with when things are going well; your horses are happy and healthy and you’re having some successes, so you feel like your efforts are reaping rewards.
For many years this happened for us at Headmore. Then within the space of about 18 months, we had so much bad luck with a variety of horses. It felt like we couldn’t do right for doing wrong and every time we thought “this has to be it” something else got thrown our way.
As a quick overview at the end of 2022, we lost a 13 year old GP horse in really tragic circumstances after his pastern shattered while I was working him at liberty in the arena. We asked many people and everyone said it was’t anything that we had done and we couldn’t have known it was going to happen but it doesn’t stop you questioning if there was something we could have done.
We then had to retire a 7 year old mare after she had a skin infection in her left foreleg, which affected the blood supply so if she is ridden the skin can’t cope with all the movement and her coronet band splits. Again we were told there was no more we could have done but again it makes you second guess yourself. We had some bad luck with young horses causing themselves mischief with silly things like getting cast and Bella, my GP mare who is my heart horse, being diagnosed with EMS before picking up an injury after falling down a hole in a surface when I was riding away from home one day. Again nothing that was “our fault” but that didn’t stop me beating myself up.

We also had to say a heartbreaking goodbye to our nine year old Fred after he was diagnosed with a brain tumour in his head. Again we tried everything but it came back with a vengeance and we had no other options for him. He wasn’t comfortable enough to be retired to a field, so we could only do the kind thing for him. This felt so cruel as he was the kindest horse you could ever wish to meet and we kept thinking ‘why him’.
All these things made me realise that actually what I care about most in all of this is the horses. It’s not the competing or the winning but simply spending time with these amazing animals and enjoying being in their presence. I wouldn’t say I’ve ever taken them for granted, but this took me back to being that horse mad little girl which is what made me choose this career path in the first place.
I almost began resenting competing, I qualified for the Winter Champs in 2023 and in all honesty I didn’t want to go. Everyone said that I would enjoy it when I got there, but I didn’t. I then qualified for the Nationals in 2023 and again I didn’t want to go…I was told I would enjoy it and again I didn’t.
It was after this Mum and I had a chat about it all and we both felt the same so we decided to choose to take a break from being between the boards.
It was during this time that I passed my list 2 judge assessment and my BDCC Level 3 so although I wasn’t competing I was still involved in the sport. I did actually sign up for an Open University Chemistry degree, as I felt like I needed something away from the horses but I pulled out of that as I felt my time was better off doing something that would still help me within the sport!
The time away from the arena was just what I needed. As a professional rider it can feel like a conveyor belt that you can’t get off; going from winter season to summer season again and again. There’s also that expectation of achieving good results, especially as I’ve been lucky to have some good successes in the past.
The break from the arena allowed me to savour the time with my horses. I never fell out of love with the horses and I never fell out of love with training them, it was simply the competition. It gave me the space to enjoy that process without the pressure of aiming for this show or that one. As the joy returned so did the competitive spirit.
I love training horses and producing them up the levels, especially the homebreds as we have brought them into this world and then can enjoy the whole journey to Grand Prix. I love my horses and I think they’re amazing and the reason I like to compete is merely to show everyone else how amazing my horses are! The time I spent with them reignited my competitive spirit. They are wonderful horses and it would be selfish of me to not let other people see them too.

I didn’t realise what an impact my story would have, when I shared it on social media. I posted because I’ve always been open and honest on social; too many people only share the good bits and that gives everyone else an unrealistic expectation of life with horses, or life in general really!
I’m so grateful to have such a supportive group of people around me, standing by me even when I talked about doing a chemistry degree! It was definitely the most difficult period of my life with the horses, at times Mum and I felt completely broken, but equally the horses are what makes us get up every morning. They are our passion and our life and as difficult as it has been I still couldn’t imagine my life without them.
This rocky period has definitely changed my outlook for the better. So it’s ok to take a break if you need it. And even if you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, remember that it’s always darkest before the dawn.
Thank you for reading and if anyone would like to get in touch with me about any of it my Facebook is Alice Oppenheimer Dressage and instagram is aliceopp15.
Alice
Photo credit: Tanja Davis
If you need support
Call our helpline free on 0800 088 2073
Or if you prefer to message then text us on 07480 488 103
To access the live chat click the purple chat button and you will be connected to one of our trained counsellors.